Pay close attention to your emotions and your body. Why are you defensive? What are you defending so fiercely? Always with defensiveness there is a lesson. When you cling to something so tightly, be it a thought, a belief system, a thing, or a person, and in defending it you experience angst, then you are not free. You are a prisoner to those thoughts, beliefs, and to the human side of you. If you can let down your defenses, then you will be able to hear the whispers of the soul. Listen carefully to what your defensiveness is telling you.
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