Never doubt that we are here.  Your guides are like parents.  At times, what you wish for is withheld for your own good.  The child does not always see or know what the parent sees.  If you can understand that those with a higher viewpoint are withholding information and experiences so that something even greater than what you desire will unfold, then you will be easier on yourself.  You are doing nothing wrong.  Simply keep striving to serve the greater good in whatever capacity.  You are part of one Whole, and you are so very loved.