Do not push yourself to do something that you know is not your calling.  How do you know if a thing is your calling or not?  It is your passion.  You cannot help but do it.  You think of doing it often.  Thinking of doing it brings joy to your heart.  Doing it brings joy and satisfaction.  If these are absent when you do a thing or think of doing that thing, then why are you thinking of doing it?  Have others told you it is a good idea?  Do you think it will bring you something you are lacking?  You have everything you need within you.  What will elicit your innate joy?  That is your calling.  What is calling you?