Stories are passed down from generation to generation.  What are you, but a story being played out in biographical form. The stories you learned and observed from your forebears become yours to tell and express.  “I am just like my mother,” or “That is just like my father” are phrases you recognize for a reason.  You are carrying on a story.  This is conditioned behavior.  Which parts of the story serve you well and which parts are like a hell?  You can change the story at any time, but this requires awareness.  Heightened awareness.  Rise above the story and observe.  These are the first two steps to changing patterns. 

You are so very loved.